I Am What I Hate

I have always found materialism and insincerity to be the things that I just can't stand. I mean, you look around and see people showing off their fancy cars and designer clothes to anyone and everyone who looks in their direction.

There is nothing wrong with being blessed with what you have, but there is a difference in your attitude. It is hard for those who have plenty to really understand how blessed they are. It is easy to take your car for granted, to take your wonderful family for granted, and to become consumed in yourself, leaving others on the back-burner.

I can tell you right now that these things that I hate so much, I have fallen victim to so many times. It's hard growing up in a comfortable home and always having food on the table. I never really knew what it felt like to not know where my next meal was coming from or how I was going get to school that day. There have been times that my family has been in a financial struggle, but my parents had saved, so we were never fully out of luck.

My grandparents have been so giving to my family as well and have always been a help to my family's financial needs. I am thankful for all my life's blessings. I don't sleep on the ground because I have to, I do it because I go on recreational trips to camp! The times when I wake up and want to complain about this or that are times where I am just as guilty as those individuals who flaunt their wealth at whoever passes by.

I don't go around flaunting my wealth in exactly the same way, but isn't taking it all for granted just as bad? I mean, while I am not consciously trying to show off all I have to others, my mindset is not a grateful one. I think that is just as bad. By forgetting that everything is a precious gift from God, I am basically telling others that its not enough; that I want more.

I can never forget where I've come from and how blessed I am to have what I have. When I forget this, I am just as guilty as those whose attitudes I criticize.

How do I let myself lose sight of what's important? I'm trying... I truly am trying. I just tend to fail more than I succeed.

I can't do this alone. There's no way I will make it.

I'm so glad I have help in this life.